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THE LAST LAUGH

YOU SAID IT
Q. What’s the most popular Department at the Mime Department Store?
A. Unmentionables

THE BRIDGE BUILDER
An old man going along a highway
Came in the evening cold and gray
To a chasm vast and deep and wide,
Through which was flowing a sullen tide.

The old man crosses in the twilight dim,
The sullen stream had no fears for him,
But he stopped when safe on the other side
And built a bridge to span the tide.

“Old man,” said a fellow pilgrim near,
“You are wasting your strength with building here;
Your journey will end with the ending day,
You never again will pass this way,
You’ve crosses the chasm deep and wide,
Why build you this bridge at evening tide?”

The builder lifted his old gray head,
“Good friend, in the path I have come,” he said,
“There followeth after me today
A youth whose feet must pass this way,
This Chasm which has been as naught to me
To that fair-haired youth might a pitfall be,
He, too, must cross in the twilight dim,
Good friend, I am building the bridge for him.”

—William Allen Dromgoole

DON’T KNOW WHO SAID IT…

It’s better to be over the hill than under it!

A Good sense of humor is essential to deal with the world’s reality.

Some succeed because they are destined to, but most succeed because they are determined to.

HUH – WHAT DID YOU SAY?
Michael Vick, quarterback of the Atlanta Falcons, on the secret of his success: “I have two weapons — my legs, my arms and my brains.”

FROM ART BUCKWALD
“An ambitious and aggressive mother conned pianist Arthur Rubinstein into listening to her ten-year-old son murder a nocturne by Chopin. At the conclusion of the massacre, Rubinstein announced, “Madam, that is undoubtedly the worst piano playing I ever heard.” Whereupon the mother nodded happily and told her son, “You see, stupid? Now will you give up those expensive piano lessons and try out for the Little League baseball team?”

FROM DAVID LETTERMAN
“CBS cancelled twelve shows. This network has tested more bombs than India.”

and…

“The real trouble started when we got the contestants mixed up for the dumb human tricks and the stupid pet tricks. They look so much alike.”

AND FINALLY…

H.J. Heinz has announced plan to lay off three thousand workers. According to a company spokesman, employees who refuse to budge will be turned over and shaken vigorously until the slide out.
—Norm MacDonald

END

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Kart Marketing Group, Inc.
Post Office Box 101
Wheaton, IL 60189 USA
Telephone: 630-653-7368
Fax: 630-653-2637
Email: karting@msn.com

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